


i'll keep your brittle heart warm

by j_whirl44



Category: Rusty Quill Gaming (Podcast)
Genre: F/F, New Relationship, also light angst, bc I Am Also Me, bc I Am Me, just a ton of soft and cuddling
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-19
Updated: 2020-08-19
Packaged: 2021-03-05 22:22:53
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,904
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25992850
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/j_whirl44/pseuds/j_whirl44
Summary: Azu can't believe how nice this feels.
Relationships: Azu/Kiko (Rusty Quill Gaming)
Comments: 8
Kudos: 18





	i'll keep your brittle heart warm

Azu stares at Kiko as she lounges on the pillows in the makeshift mini lounge they’ve spent so much time in at this point and smiles. She notices that her hair is getting longer, the black strands start to curl and frame Kiko’s face and Azu’d be lying if she said she didn’t love running her fingers through it whenever she could.

Kiko looks over at her now and Azu looks away quickly as she tries not to make it so obvious about being caught. She fails miserably.

Kiko laughs and shifts closer. She lies down and puts her head in Azu’s lap and stares up at her. A sly smile curl’s onto her lips and she winks. “There. Now you can see me better,” she says.

Azu throws her head back in a laugh and rolls her eyes. She places one hand on Kiko’s stomach and ther other in that hair that she was just thinking about seconds earlier. She starts to comb her fingers through it and Kiko’s cocky smile turns into a content one as her eyes close.

She puts both of her hands on top of the one Azu has on her stomach.

Azu can’t believe how nice this feels. After so long of just...not doing this she’d thought she was okay, and Aphroditie knows the state of the world at the moment really wasn’t conducive to these sorts of connections but somehow, someway, this felt right to her. She was aware this could be her getting swept up in the early stages, they’ve only had this for a little over a week after all, but she thinks that doesn’t really matter. She’s happy and her friends are happy for her. Even Siggif, awkward as he still is, tried to stop and congratulate them one day. Azu stood and politely nodded while Kiko just slapped a hand on his back and told him ‘better luck next time’ before pulling them away from the conversation.

They spend their time off shift together and do their best to get to know each other. They switch off telling stories of growing up, or sometimes they just sit like this in silence and take a moment to bask in each other’s warmth.

It’s just really,  _ really _ nice.

With Kiko’s eyes still closed Azu takes a moment to smile down at her and take in how relaxed she looks. She counts all the little scars peppered on her face once, twice, and three times over and then she lets out a content hum that makes Kiko pop one eye open and raise an eyebrow.

“You okay there?” she asks.

“Hm? Oh yes I-I’m fine. I am good I am good yes,” Azu stutters through her reply. If there’s one thing she hasn’t missed about new relationships; it’s this. The constant trip over her words. It’s embarrassing and silly but the teasing look Kiko gives her whenever it happens always does make it slightly worth it.

Kiko takes one hand and places it on Azu’s cheek and strokes it with her thumb. Azu leans into it. The moment’s gone quickly as Kiko removes herself from Azu’s lap only to just reposition herself leaning onto Azu’s shoulder. Again a comfortable silence takes over them as they both listen in on the work going on above deck. The scuttle of kobold feet on the wood, the heavyset stomps of Zolf, the awkward dragging of Fridriech’s fists as he walks by. It’s all sounds they’ve gotten used to in the weeks since they’ve started this journey and Azu strangely takes comfort in them now.

She situates herself so now her one arm is wrapped around Kiko’s waist and she pulls her in closer. She takes a breath, “So you have known the captain long then…” she starts.

Kiko hums and nods her head, “Since I was adopted, really. My dad was one of her most trusted, I think. She’d come with him sometimes or we’d go visit her and a few others of the crew when they were on leave. She was always very kind. Tried to teach me how to shoot once in our backyard. Didn’t go over so well with the neighbors,” she rambles.

Azu laughs at that and smiles, “I can’t imagine why,” she teases.

“I was a fine shot, they were just overreacting,” Kiko says in self-defense. Azu can’t argue. Doesn’t want to.

She feels Kiko tense in her arms slightly. It’s quick and fleeting but she also feels her take a somewhat shaky breath in and now she’s on alert.

“There’s so many stories my dad would tell me about, she was a legend. It had been years since we really saw her again. Dad retired early, he was on one trip too many, said he didn’t wanna put his life at risk like that again. We were enjoying the quiet life till...everything happened,” she explains. Her voice is more subdued and quiet now and it’s Azu’s turn to freeze up.

She hasn’t told Kiko about the time they missed yet, because really what could she say? “A murderous, presumed dead, cult stole our family members and took them to Rome where we were gone for what felt like a few days only to come back to a missing eighteen month and an apocalypse in full bloom?” Not exactly light conversation.

She’ll tell her.

Eventually.

Sometime.

But for now Azu just nods at Kiko’s explanation and waits for her to continue. Kiko now by some force curls even closer into Azu and grabs the hand not around her waist and sets them in her lap.

“She...came back. To the house. Told him she had a mission she needed people she could trust on. A quick supply run but in dangerous territory. She said I could come too, it’d be like old times. I begged him to take me. The captain tried to convince him but, he said no obviously…”

“Obviously…” Azu repeats absent mindedly. There’s a strain in Kiko’s voice now that's never been heard before and Azu’s panicking on what to do so she just pulls her closer and begins to stroke her hip.

“You know since I’m still alive,” she says. She tries to laugh and make a joke out of it but it falls flat.

“Oh...oh I see,” Azu says. There’s something she’s missing. Something is close to clicking in her brain but she can’t figure it out.

Then it hits her all at once.

She tries to keep her body neutral even though there’s a drop in her stomach that makes her want to tense up but she fights the instinct.

“Kiko you don’t have to talk about this if you don’t want to I-I understand things can be private between us I won’t hold it against you or anything-” Azu starts.

The other woman sits up and faces Azu. Her eyes are confused as she shakes her head, “No Azu it’s...it’s okay I don’t,” she gives a nervous laugh, “I don’t mind talking about this with you. I’m sorry if I was too forward. I guess it’s not really a good look to talk to your brand new girlfriend about your dead dad huh?”

Azu laughs in relief and gives her a kiss on the forehead, “No it’s fine, really, just…” she takes in a deep breath and tries again, “How long ago was this?”

Kiko’s a little thrown by the question but she recovers quickly. She takes a moment to think and gives a noncommittal shrug, “I honestly don’t really remember,” she says, “It’s maybe been around six or seven months. I heard of the crash but there was no report of where the ship or Amelia had gone so I didn’t have much hope in finding them. It’s the job, that’s what he always said anyway. We knew this was always a risk,” she finishes. She’s smiling but there’s nothing bright about it. Her eyes are shiny with tears forming and Azu is pained to see it but she hardens her face. She clears her throat, “I came to Hiroshima to just do typical ship work. Helped repair on the ground mostly but I saw the ad for crew for one Amelia Earhart and I thought it was a joke. Thought she was dead,” another joyless laugh, “She was under my nose the whole time. Ain’t that something?”

“Yes…” is all Azu says in response, she’s distracted by what it all means.

“Are you...okay?” Kiko asks, “you seem distracted.”

“Oh I’m fine. I’m great, I just...am sorry to hear this,” Azu says.  _ ‘I’m sorry what it implies’  _ she thinks.

Kiko gives her a sad smile and then begins to lean in. She kisses Azu softly and they both sort of melt into it. It’s almost enough to make Azu forget what Kiko just said. Almost.

For the moment though Azu ignores it and grabs both sides of Kiko’s face to kiss her deeper. There’s a slight surprise yelp that comes from her but there’s no objections after that. When they break apart there’s some light back in Kiko’s eyes that she’s using to give Azu a playful look. She leans in to give one last quick peck before moving back.

“Well maybe if you want to kiss me like that I need to talk about my dead relatives more often,” Kiko says. It’s said lightly and teasingly and there is still a sparkle of that confidence in Kiko’s tone and face but it still makes Azu falter for a moment. Kiko sighs, “and that was a really stupid thing to say. Sorry. This is all very new to me too. Didn’t expect you to...well I just didn’t expect you, Azu.”

Azu smiles and looks at the floor before responding, “I could very much say the same about you.”

Kiko smiles and sighs. She rearranges some of the pillows in the opposite corner and fluffs them up and then lays down. She looks expectantly at Azu and pats the spot next to her. Azu gives another small laugh and obliges.

They lay there face to face and stare at each other for some time. It’s only midday and they need to go back to work eventually but there’s no one really on the crew that would take it upon themselves to come bust them. Not even Zolf. So they take the chance.

Kiko buries herself into Azu’s chest and starts to drift off. Azu rubs up and down her back and listens to her steady breathing.

She stays up and thinks about what to do next. She has no idea how Kiko would react if she found out Amelia unintentionally got her father killed. If she’d go off the deep end with Amelia or try and take her out. Neither options were optimal right now, and so Azu feels sick. She’s stuck in her head on what to do and she doesn’t have the first clue where to start.

She closes her eyes and centers herself. A deep breath in and out. There’s no point in thinking about it right this second, not with Kiko peacefully napping in her arms. So she begs her brain to push it to the side for now. Maybe she’ll talk to Zolf about it later. Maybe Cel.

For now, she’ll stay here and drift off away from a world that just got more complicated.

**Author's Note:**

> did i PERHAPS write this running off 3 hours of sleep and being up for 14 already which in turn made me soft and yearn to have a pirate girlfriend of my own that i could just lazily cuddle and nap with?
> 
> maybe so.meme
> 
> anyways, hope you enjoyed I Am Worried About Kiko. (also of course this is my take on how i heard Kiko explain what happened to her dad. it's not confirmed any which way in canon but I Truly Am Thinking)
> 
> title from peace by Taylor Swift <3


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